The game of life is something that we all get to play.
It’s not so much a conscious choice of ours to participate. More that our parents once had a twinkle in their eyes and… yeah, you get the picture.
A sad fact of the world, that we all want to change, is that not everyone was born with the same opportunities.
People suggest that we’re “not born equal”. Personally I dislike this statement, as it immediately suggests that an individual is worth less than another.
Difficulty levels
Mel and I were talking earlier about how life can feel a bit like starting a brand new video game.
You’re often faced with a choice to set a difficulty level. These can range from easy to impossible… or whatever word the game’s developers use to signify a very challenging experience.
Unfortunately there have always been difficulty levels built into life. It shouldn’t be this way, but it has been for a long time.
Where you were born, who your parents are, your nationality and even your gender. These have all mattered and sadly, in a lot of negative ways.
For the record, I feel I should share that I believe every human being in this world is important and valued. It saddens me deeply that there are people in the world who don’t get to feel valued and are put down for archaic and very wrong reasons.
One day I hope that everyone will be able to start their life from the same place. Everyone will get the same opportunities. And everyone will be respected and appreciated.
The mistakes we make
Mistakes are a part of life.
While they’re something that can bring us down and make things more challenging, they’re also something that we should celebrate. If we didn’t make mistakes then we’d never be able to learn from them.
Learning from your mistakes is a very powerful tool. It helps you to understand, adapt and grow as a human being.
But there’s a problem. It’s far too easy to dwell on old mistakes.
We look back at the past and think about the mistakes that we’ve made. We wonder what would have gone differently.
It’s really tough to avoid. I find myself doing it all the time. Especially at the weird point in the night when I wake up at 3am and my brain wants to try and process everything at 200mph.
It’s important to find a way to accept past mistakes and to move on from them. We can’t change them, so instead we should use them as a positive catalyst for the future.
Gamification of life
Part of the conversation I had with Mel was about the gamification of life and how it can affect our physical and mental wellbeing.
For example, there have been a number of fitness related video games. These reward players with in-game progress in accordance with the physical actions they take.
One very popular game last year was RingFit Adventure on the Nintendo Switch.
It’s a game that comes with a flexible ring. Players control their character by using the ring during physical activity and exercise. It probably doesn’t surprise you to hear that the game was sold out in a lot of countries during lockdowns because of the pandemic.
There are of course many other examples that we can point to as well. Even a simple app that tracks how many steps someone takes in a day, can be hugely encouraging.
I write this as someone who is overweight. I’m not in the best shape of my life, far from it. Unfortunately running my business and suffering from depression left me in a place where I was looking backwards instead of forwards.
That’s one of the key things that we need to try and avoid. If we spend all of our time and mental energy looking at the past, how can we enjoy today and tomorrow?
Look forwards not back
Until the day that time machines are invented, we have to face a simple fact… there is absolutely nothing we can do to change the past.
Even the few seconds ago when you were reading the previous paragraph. That time has gone. It’s not time that will come back and you can’t spend it doing something else.
There’s a very real need to understand that we have a finite time on this Earth.
Do you want to be the person who enjoys life, gets the most out of it and works towards your goals and dreams?
Or do you want to be the person who reflects on the past? Someone that wishes they could go back and change things, perhaps forgetting about the possibilities of tomorrow.
No matter how shit something is in your life, there is always a tomorrow. There’s a chance of a brighter, more fulfilling day. A day that will bring a smile to your face and warmth to your heart.
Living for today and tomorrow gives you a chance to breathe more easily. You’re focused on the things that you can change, rather than things that have gone.
The “life game”
Coming back to the game analogy… I thought it would be really interesting if there were ways that we could play a “life game”, receiving benefits tomorrow for our actions today.
I was saying this to Mel with an example of an iPhone app. Maybe that app could connect to your exercise bike, treadmill, rowing machine, weights, shoes, etc. All of the actions that you take today, give you a benefit that you receive tomorrow.
That would be a fun game and would encourage people to take more actions today that will benefit their future.
The thing is, as I’m sure you already know, it already exists. You don’t need an app for it. I don’t need an app for it. We have the power to make these changes already.
We just need to actually go out there and do something. Take action.
Old habits die hard
When you’re trying to make changes, the first step is usually the hardest.
It’s why getting rid of bad habits or making a positive change in your life can be so difficult. Whether you’re trying to lose weight, stop smoking or quit another habit, the mindset shift is so hard that it’s the first point of failure.
There’s a popular myth that it takes 21 days to form a habit. You’ve probably heard someone use the ’21 day’ line before.
In the 1960s Maxwell Maltz, a plastic surgeon, had his work on self-image misinterpreted. This led to people believing that he had suggested it took 21 days to form a habit and a myth was born.
More recently, in 2009, Philippa Lally from UCL (University College London) conducted research that suggested it takes 66 days to form a habit.
That number alone can put someone off. 66 days sounds like a lot of time right?
It’s not that long though.
You only have to look at the last year, where many of us forgot what day it was and had Zoom calls in pyjamas. Time passed quite quickly and for most of us, it can’t pass soon enough.
There’s probably a habit that you want to change right now. It’s completely in your power and ability to make that change. You just have to take the first step.
For me, I’m currently working on having a better daily routine. Mel and I are both night owls. We enjoy evenings a lot more than we do mornings, but it’s not productive at all.
So I’m working on sleeping earlier (and longer), waking up between 6am – 7am every day. Being honest with you, it’s not enjoyable. I don’t really like waking up in the morning that early.
I’m changing my routine because I know that it will give be a better tomorrow. That’s what keeps me going.
Kindness is so important
I believe that kindness is one of the most important traits and skills that every human can (and should) possess.
In fact, I even talked about it at an online conference for digital agencies last year:
If we can take the time to be kinder to others around us, we’re able to make the world a better place.
Kinder to your family. Kinder to your friends. Kinder to your clients, colleagues and yes even your boss.
Living a life of kindness can only spread positivity, joy and warmth further around the world. As I said in the video above, kindness isn’t a weakness… it’s a superpower.
I’m in the process of writing a book on the topic of kindness, which I’ll hopefully get published later this year – so watch this space on that.
What can you do today that makes tomorrow better?
I want to leave you with the simple question in the heading above.
What can you do today that makes tomorrow better? What actions can you take that make a positive change in your life or the lives of those around you?
No matter what situation you’re in right now, you are a strong and powerful human being.
Even if you feel like you’re at your lowest point right now, I want you to know that I believe in your power to make changes for good.
Take the first step. Do that thing you’ve been putting off for ages. Make today the first step towards big changes in your life.
The actions you take today make tomorrow a better place.
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